More Fun and Games from the Star Wars Universe

I know, I know. I shouldn't be taking a night off from the Gatekeepers to write up an article but I had to comment on the on the Clone Wars cartoon. As I sit here on Friday night watching it I have compiled a list of things that I never knew about the Star Wars universe. Don't get me wrong the cartoon is great but.....

  • Jedi can, when called upon, can throw thousands upon thousands of troops around like toys when needed. This also includes troop landers as well.
  • The Emperor really waged war because he was looking for a good pair of dentures (his teeth look horrible in this)
  • Mace Windu is the baddest MF in the Universe. He has fists of solid steel which he uses to bash the crap out of thousands of battle droids
  • You can sneak up on Jedis, you just need a more important special character than them to do it
  • Ten thousand robots still only attack targets in easily manageable groups when fighting jedi
  • Coruscant, for all its technology and defensive capabilities can easily be snuck up on by a massive droid force until you actually look outside your window and see them flying down
  • Mace Windu is the baddest MF in the Universe. He has purple lightsaber, purple starfighter, purple droid... if ain't purple, Mace Windu doesn't want anything to do with it
  • Ankin Skywalker can and will kick you ass with this force powered stump
  • Biker gangs can kick any army's butt given enough jousting lances
  • Count Dooku's character looks like an angry Sean Connery
  • The Emperor's Bunker is as well defended as a bus stop during rush hour
  • Mace Windu is the baddest MF in the Universe. He took one look at General Grevious and realized that if you use the Force to crush his internal structure you don't have to worry about fighting all those damn lightsabers. NO ONE else even thought of that.
  • You can never crack enough Count Dooku jokes because everyone in the cartoon looks like they're about to take one